April 27, 2011

Oh My God, We Bought a Dump!

Yesterday was Closing Day on The Lodge, and we couldn't be more thrilled.  While we've been getting lots of great feedback on how nice the house looks (thanks for that!), the truth is its a Monet. You know, looks good from far away but up close it's a big mess.

(I admit to quoting the movie Clueless frequently in daily life.  Like the gems, "Hey James Bond, in America we drive on the right side of the road" or "Let's do a lap before we commit to a location." It might have been the best thing to come out of 1995.)

It you remember from this post, the first time we ever walked through the home was in September of 2010.  At the time, it had been vacant for only about 5 months, and even though it had lost some of the polish from the listing photos, it wasn't too bad.  We put in our offer early November, and then left our big baby all alone through a particularly terrible Minnesota winter until the bank finally gave us the go ahead to buy the joint.  So when we finally got to go back in in March for our inspection, we weren't quite prepared for it.  I'm not sure if the winter was just really hard on this empty home, or if we had fantasized about the place until it looked much better in our minds, but when we finally got back in there, our hearts sank.  It was filled with dead bugs, carpet stains, damaged doors, walls and trim, and all those "quirks" that we can't wait to rip out.  I literally said to the Hubby, "Oh my God, we bought a dump."  He responded back with a smile, 'Yes we did, and it's exactly what we wanted."  Three cheers for those times when he knows exactly what to say to make me feel better.  

So in celebration of the big day, we thought we'd be real with you and give you a little montage of the gross stuff.  The best part- it's worse today, filled with a sea of boxes and mis-matched furniture.  It can only get better from here.


Rock filled ledges and open windows in our master bedroom
Close up on the rock in The Loft so you can appreciate their grossness.  We've found batteries and bottle caps hidden in them.

Chicken wire on the back of the steps

Full wall mirror in the dining room

Super gross toilet, and shower floor, in the Master Bath.
Sweet pile of groceries the previous owners left for us, including half a handle of "Wild Berry Jack."
Gross, dirty and cracked tile floors
Damaged, dirty and stained walls and molding.

Literally every inch, of every wall needs to be painted or refinished.
Dead bugs everywhere
Strange light switches on many floor outlets
Stain on the fireplace hearth that my mom swears is blood, and I'm starting to believe her.

"Rain Shower" painted tiles in the Main Bath
Herringbone and brown grout tile covering the downstairs bath

Cabinet left behind with literally 2 dozen different types of air fresheners, the stench is overwhelming.  It reminds me of that scene in the movie Seven where they hung hundreds of air fresheners in the room with the nearly dead man.  How will I ever put food in here?

Old, beat up wood and storage boxes on The Living Room Deck
Broken Screen in the Screened-In Porch

Two Words: Cat Door

Update: Those pictures might be terrible, but I love these, taken by my uber-talented cousin Morgan.  They were taken late last night after a long day of moving in the rain, so try not to judge our clothes and hair, and just take a look at our super happy faces! :)  We're home!

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