Rain Drops Keep Falling on my Head

I thought I was going to spend this post today updating you on a few little things we have done to spruce up the Dining Room, but instead, I'm going to show you this:

Why yes, that is a big hole in my Dining Room ceiling, and yes, it's right next to our brand new West Elm capiz chandy.  If you guessed that our Bath Crashers Master Bathoom is leaking again... you would be right.

See those stains on the ceiling, and especially around the base of the light fixture?  Those make me very unhappy.


My parents were actually the ones that brought the expanding stain of doom to my attention.  In truth, I haven't spent much time thinking about this ceiling since I spent hours painting it after Bath Crashers left and patched the ceiling for the first time, and then hung the new chandelier.  But as my parents looked up to admire the new light, they noticed the stain, and when I went to touch the area, my finger went right through the soaking wet ceiling.  Super de dooper.

Our Bath Crashers producers immediately sent over the plumber who did the work on our home.  I love John, he's a really nice guy and he went out of his way to help us out during the filming.  He even fixed the outdoor water faucet at the front of our house while he was there at no charge.  John provided us with this little nugget of a quote, "The hurrier I go the behinder I get."  I definitely agree with John, completing a bathroom remodel in 3 days isn't the ideal situation.  6 weeks later, here is how the room looks:

Entrance to the bathroom and Jay's closet- doors were removed to shorten them so that they could open and close.  We're crossing our fingers that someone brings them back.

Bottom of this closet is a dusty and dirty tool storage.

Track lights were removed and replaced with two cheapo flush mounts.  I have a plan for these, but we need to patch and paint the ceiling first.

Pocket door still needs poly.

My closet is still exposed to the world.  We heard a rumor that they were bringing us new closet doors, but we haven't seen anything yet.

Back down in the Dining Room, the drywall guy who opened up the ceiling spotted the leak immediately.  It was a slow drip from one of the connections that wasn't tight enough, it's just been slowly dripping for 6 weeks. Once the drywall guy opened the ceiling this morning, John the Plumber came back to "fix" the problem.  He must not have checked his work though, because now it's worse than ever and water rains down from the ceiling like a faucet when the shower is on.

I get asked all the time if knowing what I know now, would I still do Bath Crashers, and the answer is definitely yes maybe.  The Hubs says "Absolutely not."  At the end of the day, we will have a space that is a million times better than the poo-sandwich that we started with, and we got it all for absolutely free. It's just going to take us awhile to get there. If I could change anything (beside making it perfect right away), I would have just managed my expectations a little more.  If I would have known that I was going to have to do a lot of work, and that the bathroom really isn't complete when they leave, that it could take months to finish, I might be a little more accepting of our current situation.  I'm just so impatient, and I just want to move into my Master Bedroom already. Or at least not have water raining down into our Dinning Room... is that too much to ask?

#53-I Sewed Cushions for a Couch! (And the Big Couch Reaveal!)

Beyond all expectations, I somehow managed to build an outdoor sectional for my Screened In Porch by building the first piece, then cutting and building the remaining pieces, and finally sanding, staining and polying the sections.  And somehow, magically, it was actually looking good.  Real good.  But the next part is the one I was sure to mess up- sewing the cushions.  It's not that I can't sew.  I've sewn curtains for the Guest Bedroom and curtains for Ry's Robot Bedroom, as well as pillows for the Guest bedroom and Ry's Bedroom.  I've even managed to make a few dresses in my day.  The problem is that they never seem to turn out as professionally as I hope, and I always have a feeling that people can tell they're home made.  They are just staring at me, always judging, watching... (Sorry, a little 'Old School' for you there.)  That's all fine with me when it comes to curtains and pillows, but for an entire couch, not so much.

I started first by looking online, and was thrilled to see a 20% off sale for the West Elm cushions that go with the very Wood Slat Sectional that I was building.  They only had one color, Dusty Navy, but I figured that I could make it work.  That is until the reality of how many cushions I really needed added up.

Yikes!  I tried my local home improvement stores, and even (gasp!) Walmart, and it didn't take me long to realize that the only way I was going to be able to do this affordably was to sew my own. My luck turned around though when I stumbled across a  60% off sale on outdoor fabrics at my favorite discount fabric store Mill End, and I was able to come home with all this goodness for just $64. 

I decided that it would be best if the main cushions were a more neutral gray, and I could add color and fun with throw pillows, (and therefore change them out over the years and avoid having the sectional feel dated too soon.)

That's 11 yards of outdoor fabric at just $4 a square foot.  Whoo to the hoo!

Cutting is where I've always had difficulty in the past, but this time, I discovered the magic that is a  cutting mat and quilting wheel cutter.  (My 18 year old self just rolled her eyes in disgust by the way.)  My cousin left it behind at my house from a project we were working on together, and all I could say was, "where have you been all my life?"  The mat was a little small, (my seat cushions needed to be cut at  25" x 25" to give be 24" x24" cushions with 1/2" seems, and the mat was 18" x 24") so I also introduced a tool that I am much more familiar and comfortable with, my drywall T Square. 

Yes, that is a Corona with a lime in it with my supplies.  It was a warm Sunday afternoon and my kiddo was napping.  The real question is why wouldn't I have a Corona while sewing?

Just like measuring for drywall, I marked my lines and checked them for square before cutting, with the help of this handy little air erase fabric pen.

It took me an entire nap, 3 full hours, to cut all the pieces for all 15 cushions of my couch.  I need 15 because there are 6 bottom seat cushions for each of my pieces whose finished size would be 24" x 24".  Then I needed 9 backs, each at 24" x 12", 1 for each armless middle and 2 for each corner piece.  Not to mention the 5 throw pillows and another cushion and 5 additional throw pillows that I'll tell you more about in a second.  It was exhausting.

It wasn't until I was in the process of cutting all these pieces until I realized the 2 major items I was forgetting: ties for the cushions and zippers.  In order to keep these cushions secure to the sectional, each cushion would need a set of ties in each back corner, 4 ties per cushion, 60 ties total.  So I began the long and boring task of cutting (60) 3" x 12" pieces, and then folding and ironing them into strips.  Once again I found myself slaving by the iron like Cinderella.  Cinderella with a Corona... which 'aint too bad actually.

A small sample of my ties pile.

The zippers were a bit more tricky, but necessary if I ever wanted to take these pieces off and wash them. (Anyone that lives with both adult and child size men knows that removable slip covers are a necessity.)  I needed 27 zippers total for all the cushions and throw pillows I planned to sew, and at $2.79 a zipper, that would have been more than the cost of all my fabric!  Luckily a little Google search unearthed (50) 20" white zippers for just $19.99, shipping included, so after this whole project is over I'll be searching Pinerest for zipper project ideas.  While I waited 2 days for my zippers to arrive, I headed to JoAnn Fabrics, where I had been stalking their cushions for weeks waiting for the perfect sale.  As luck would have it their 24"x24"x3" cushions were 50% off, and with my 10% your total purchase including sale items coupon, the nearly had to pay me to take that stuff out of the store.  That's a dirty lie, the cushions still cost me a pretty penny at $120, but at a grand total of $207 for all my cushions, I was still coming in at almost $500 under the West Elm sale price. Plus I got an additional cushion and 10 throw pillows to boot!

 The sewing actually went much quicker than I thought, and as each piece was finished I sort of danced my way out to the porch to put them on an admire my handy work.  Which reminds me- thanks Hubs for putting up with me.  I realize that you're stuck with me for life, but I know I don't always make that easy for you.  You know, with all my prancing and fist pumping.

And for the big grand finale, here she is in all her chillaxin' glory:

 

 

For those of you spreadsheet nerds out there (Hi Builder Chuck!) my total cost of this 6 piece sectional was just $288!  For reference, had I purchased this exact configuration from West Elm including the sale price cushions, the total price would have been $2,224!  Yep, that math is right, nearly two thousand dollars more.  Plus, included in my $288 is this little bonus:

While I was at it I whipped up a bottom cushion and some back pillows for the Living Room Deck box we recently overhauled.  Fun right?  I still have a some more work to do to accessorize these spaces (I'm dreaming of a fun outdoor rug, a beverage tray stand, a round coffee table of some sort and some planters and end tables....) but right now I'm going to take a break and enjoy my little masterpiece.  Oh, and if you're wondering, the sectional is the most comfortable place in the house.  The other evening it was raining outside, so I head out there to curl up with a blanket and a glass of wine to listen to the storm.  I ended up falling asleep and spent the whole night out there until Hubs woke up the next morning and sent the search dogs out for me.  It was so comfortable I could have been sleeping on my own plush mattress.  With room to sleep at least 2, I can see this being a great spot for kid sleepovers in the future.

So what do you guys think?  Anyone else have any building projects on their list?  Or major sewing projects? I actually can't believe how fast this one went, and I'm so glad I did it.


Wanna rewind and see how it all came together?

Build the Couch Part 1
Build the Couch Part 2
Stain (India Ink) the Couch
Sew the Cushions

10 Tips for Applying Polyurethane

I've had a couple of questions on this one, so I thought it warented repeating, and placing it in it's own blog post so that we can easily reference it.  So here it is, after much trial and error, my top 10 tips for applying poly to a wood project.
  

1. Stir the can, don’t shake it.  And don't just stir, scoop and pull up the poly from the bottom of the can to the top, which will make sure that the additives that make the poly matte or gloss mix evenly throughout the can.

2. Use a matte finish on beautiful stained wood project, but painted or india ink pieces call for a semi-gloss (or high gloss if you are feeling sassy) to give the finish more depth and interest.

3. Use a water based poly because it washes with water, doesn't have the yellowing effect of an oil base, and you can use it inside so you don't have to worry about bugs or particles in the outside air sticking to your piece.   

4. Apply thin, even coats, but not too thin.  Too thin can leave brush strokes on your project, so apply for a smooth, even finish.

5. Make sure your piece is 100% how you want it before you apply poly.  You can't touch up any stain or paint underneath once it's applied, and poly only makes a mistake look worse.

6. Do not go back over poly after it has been applied, even just 30 seconds later.  Once poly begins to dry, rubbing a wet brush back over that surface will cause brush stokes. 

7. Apply the poly with the grain and the full length of your board/piece.  If you stop or start applying anywhere in the middle of the board you will regret it. 

8. Try to apply in an environment that is above 40 degrees, or below 80.  Do not be an dummy like me and apply when it is 91 degrees and incredibly humid outside.  The poly begins to dry so fast that it’s really tough to make sure you don’t have any brush marks.

9. Unlike staining, I never recommend flipping your piece upside down to poly the underside.  Poly can drip, and there is nothing worse than flipping over your project to discover ugly thick drips on the most visable portion of your piece.  It may take a little yoga positioning to get in the tricky spots underneath, but it’s totally worth it for a clean finish on top.

10. Sand your full piece lightly with between coat sandpaper (220 grit or higher) really lightly before applying a second coat.  This is not just to remove any specs or dust from the first coat, but because poly doesn’t stick very well to itself, and roughing up the edges helps it adhere better.  This will help you avoid any pealing or scratching down the road.  And don’t worry, sanding will cloud up your finish, but I promise it will turn crystal clean again once you apply the next coat. 

#52- I Sanded, Stained and Polyed a Couch (Part 3)

The great couch build of 2011 continues!  On Day 1 I built the first piece just to get my feet wet, (who came up with that saying by the way, sort of gross), and on Day 2 I cut and put together 4 more pieces.  The morning of Day 3 I was jumping at the bit to finish up the final piece, so I brought Ry out in the Screened in Porch with me and put together the last piece while sipping my morning cup gallon of coffee and while Ry played with his toy tools.  Once again, I was so pumped to move on to the next step that I forgot to snap a photo of my completed piece, so you'll just have to trust me on this one.

The next step was to sand down each piece with my power sander.  For this project I bought "quality" pine at $1.87 an 8' length,  which is better than "standard" which is usually full of big knots, warped or bent, but not as good as "select" which is usually clear without any knots.  The difference between "quality" and "select" for this project would have been over $100 (133% more than I already spent), and since I knew I was going to finish it really dark, (more on the finish in a minute) I thought I could get away with the cheaper wood. The thing with cheap wood is that there is great wood there underneath it, you just have to work for it.

The real muscle comes when trying to take out any of the stamps, UPCs, writing or color coding on the wood.  Seriously, there has got to be a better way to label these guys.  Like the rest of this project, it really wasn't hard.  In fact, it was dumb work- run the sander over the wood until it is smooth.  It was just long and messy.  Once they were all smooth and clear, I blew the sawdust off and wiped down each piece carefully with tacky cloth.

For the finish, I've been dying to use India Ink again ever since I tried it on our "new" kitchen table. India Ink is a jet black ink that you can purchase in art stores, and has a really thin, watery consistency.  It is by far the easiest finish that I have ever used because:

A. It goes on in one coat, and immediately gets your wood the darkest shade of black possible while still showing through the wood grain.  (Just don't be afraid to apply liberally and let the ink soak in.)

B. Its not sticky so you don't have to worry about saw dust, bugs or debris in the air. It goes on just like water. 

C. There's no problems with brush strokes or uneven color.

D. It dries to the touch really quickly so that you can move onto the poly faster. 

While sadly I can't use it for everything, in this case you look right through our black accented Kitchen into the Screened in Porch, so it definitely works with the space around it. Plus, my inspiration photo from West Elm is dark brown, if not black:

Sold!  India Ink it is, and it couldn't have come at a better project. With 6 pieces there was a ton of surface area to cover, plus with all the boards and gaps between them, this project would have been a nightmare to stain evenly or to paint without drips and brush strokes.  

I flipped my pieces upside down first to get the undersides fully covered, and within 10 minutes they were dry to the touch enough to flip them to the other side.  The best part?  All 6 pieces needed just one $14 bottle of India Ink.  So far this 6 piece sectional has cost just $81.

Next it was time to move on to the polyurethane, my least favorite step, ever.  Why?  Because nothing has the potential to ruin an almost completed project as easily as poly.  It can drip, it can get saw dust in it, and it can ruin all the hard work you've put into that point.  Since you have to apply many, thin and even coats of poly with a brush, I had plenty of time to think while applying 4 coats to all 6 pieces. So from the crazed mind of an over worked DIYer, I give you my

Top 10 Tips for Applying Polyurethane:

 

1. Stir the can, don’t shake it.  And don't just stir, scoop and pull up the poly from the bottom of the can to the top, which will make sure that the additives that make the poly matte or gloss mix evenly throughout the can.

2. Use a matte finish on beautiful stained wood project, but painted or india ink pieces call for a semi-gloss (or high gloss if you are feeling sassy) to give the finish more depth and interest.

3. Use a water based poly because it washes with water, doesn't have the yellowing effect of an oil base, and you can use it inside so you don't have to worry about bugs or particles in the outside air sticking to your piece.   

4. Apply thin, even coats, but not too thin.  Too thin can leave brush strokes on your project, so apply for a smooth, even finish.

5. Make sure your piece is 100% how you want it before you apply poly.  You can't touch up any stain or paint underneath once it's applied, and poly only makes a mistake look worse.

6. Do not go back over poly after it has been applied, even just 30 seconds later.  Once poly begins to dry, rubbing a wet brush back over that surface will cause brush stokes. 

7. Apply the poly with the grain and the full length of your board/piece.  If you stop or start applying anywhere in the middle of the board you will regret it. 

8. Try to apply in an environment that is above 40 degrees, or below 80.  Do not be an dummy like me and apply when it is 91 degrees and incredibly humid outside.  The poly begins to dry so fast that it’s really tough to make sure you don’t have any brush marks.

9. Unlike staining, I never recommend flipping your piece upside down to poly the underside.  Poly can drip, and there is nothing worse than flipping over your project to discover ugly thick drips on the most visable portion of your piece.  It may take a little yoga positioning to get in the tricky spots underneath, but it’s totally worth it for a clean finish on top.

10. Sand your full piece lightly with between coat sandpaper (220 grit or higher) really lightly before applying a second coat.  This is not just to remove any specs or dust from the first coat, but because poly doesn’t stick very well to itself, and roughing up the edges helps it adhere better.  This will help you avoid any pealing or scratching down the road.  And don’t worry, sanding will cloud up your finish, but I promise it will turn crystal clean again once you apply the next coat.  

The added benefit of poly on an india ink piece, is it takes the dull, almost matte finish of the india ink, and almost immediately makes the finish look deep and shiny.  Just look at the difference in these two pieces. 

 

The only thing different about these guys is that the one in back has 1 coat of poly on it.

So there it is, so far I cut, I built, I sanded and I stained.  Next (tomorrow) comes the scary part- I sewed.  

#52-I Built a Couch (Part 2)

For those of you just tuning in, I recently built a couch using the step by step tutorial from Ana-White.com.  On day one I cut and assembled the first piece just to make sure I had the hang of it. After my first successful couch piece was built, I woke up the next morning (Friday), ready to rock out the rest of those pieces.  I was lucky to have a half day at work, so at around 1PM I headed home and started cutting boards with the goal to cut for the entire couch by the time I had to pick up my little monster from daycare.  Again, Ana's tutorial and cut list made it a piece of cake, so the only thing that made it tough was the endurance.  Each corner piece is made of 23 pieces, and each armless (center) piece is made of 20, so all in I had 126 boards to cut for my 6 piece sectional.  Yikes!  I used a few tricks I have learned along the way though to make it go a little faster, like when you need to cut boards the same size, you can quickly measure for the second by placing it on top of the board you need to cut, and lining up your saw blade.

Once you have it lined up perfectly, you can just drop down your saw, cutting just the bottom board.  This is a great trick when building furniture because it guarantees all your equal length pieces are the same.  Just 1/16th of a difference can cause a chair to wobble. 

PS- In retrospect I'm not sure that doing home improvement with bangle bracelets on is a good idea. 

So that things didn't get too confusing, I stacked all my wood in a pile for each sectional piece.

 

And marked with pencil on each board the size so that there would be no confusion infuriating accidents once it came to putting these bad boys together.

I finished cutting with an hour or so to spare, so I headed to daycare early to get in some good quality time with the kiddo.  We went for a run around the lake, played in the sprinkler in the backyard, and made some dinner together since his new favorite thing is wearing his chefs hat and cooking along with me.  Epic good day. 

The Hubs had to work really early the next morning, so I waited until they were both in bed around 9:30 PM to get started with the building.  Ana's tutorial suggests that you do one a day, but I was hoping to get a few done and really move this project along.  You may remember, I started with this that I had completed the night before:

Again, I'm not going to bore you with the step by step details since I couldn't be as clear and concise as Ana if I tried (I tend to ramble.  Oh, you knew that already?  Of course you did).  There was an awful lot of Kreg Jig action happening though, since everyone of my boards needed at least 2-4 pocket holes in each one (Quick math we're talking upwards of 252 pocket holes to drill!). Which is far better than 252 exposed screws though, so well worth it. 

Kreg Jig in action

Oh yeah, and I got smart after the first piece and started drilling over a tarp.  I had forgotten that our screened in porch is lined with screen on the bottom as well to prevent bugs from coming up through the cracks in the decking.  Unfortunately this screen also makes a great sawdust trap.  Grr.

Thanks to the time stamp on my camera, I know at 10:44PM I had this:

 

Note my laptop with Ana's tutorial near by me at all times.  At 11:34 PM, I had this.

On average it was taking me about an or so to build each piece.  It wasn't too tricky, again, it just takes a while to drill all the pocket holes and make sure everything was lined up, glued and square.  If I haven't mentioned it before, always always glue every piece you put together.  The bond is so much stronger, and your piece won't warp and shift overtime. It started to get pretty long and exhausting after a while, but I've run a couple of marathons in my day, and you know that place where you sort of black out and have an out of body experience while you truck along?  Yep- I went there.  I didn't intend on finishing so much in one evening, but before I knew it, it was 1:27AM and I had this:

I won't lie, I definitely considered cranking out the last corner piece before I went to bed, just to get it all done in one evening, But then I remembered that Captain Chaos would likely be ready to party around 8AM the next morning, and there was no need to punish myself just to prove a point to, well... myself (Yes, my two, almost three year old goes to bed at 8 PM each night and wakes the next day around 8 AM. Then he takes a 3 hour nap each day.  I am the luckiest girl I know). So I called it a night, took a shower to get all the sawdust out of my hair, and was asleep the moment I hit the pillow.  The Hubs did wake up for just a second as I crawled into bed and I swear I heard him mutter "psycho" under his breath as he looked at the clock and rolled over.

#52-I Built a Couch!

Yep, you read that right.  And it felt so good to say that I'll say it again- I built a couch! Not just any couch, but a sectional that could sit at least 6 people.  All thanks to the super amazing Ana White.  Haven't been to Ana-White.com yet?  She's a mom and a home maker from Alaska that began building her own furniture because all the beautiful, designer furniture she loved was way out of her price range.  (Sounds familiar.)  Now she not only shares her work, but she provides step by step instructions for hundreds of different pieces, including materials lists, cut lists and full diagrams.  The minute I saw this post for her take on the West Elm Wood Slat Sectional, I knew I needed it in our screened in porch like the Hubs needs his remote for his new toilet.

I mean, just take a look at how beautiful it looks in West Elm's catalog.  Seriously, its like design porn:

My first major task, getting all the wood purchased and to my home.  The materials list was easy to follow, and after adding up all my pieces, I discovered that I needed (36) 8'x1"x4"s.  That's a lot of sticks of wood.  To top it off I ran to the store over my lunch hour, so it must have been pretty hilarious to watch a girl in a business skirt and heels try to load up and push a flat bed cart full of wood up to the check out. The good news is that (36) 1 x 4s cost me just $67, (of course they were on sale, don't you know me at all?) and building a sectional that seats 6 for $67 feels like stealing.  That evening after the boys went to bed I decided to cut and build the first piece.  I figured it was best to start with the first one, and build it to completion, just to make sure I understood all the instructions and didn't have any problems.   I figured that if all went well I could mass produce the rest the next couple of days.  It went pretty well, and I'm not going to walk you through how to build this step by step, because Ana's got all that covered and then some with her tutorial.  I will share with you a few suggestions as you follow her plan though.

1. Read through all the instructions before you start dummy.  Yep, that's like the #1 rule for pretty much everything, but of course I thought I was too smart for that.  So when I got to step #3 that said, "Do this step prior to doing steps 1 & 2 if you are using a Kreg Jig, I pretty much threw my hammer.

2. If you can, use a Kreg Jig.  Haven't heard of that before?  It's a sweet little tool that allows you to connect 2 boards perpendicularly without any screws showing.  The pocket screw this jig creates not only looks better, but holds your 2 boards together much more securely.  A Kreg Jig will run you about $99, but if you plan to build any other furniture projects any time in the future, it will pretty much pay for itself.

3. If you're going to use a Kreg Jig, make sure to build Ana's template for a center (armless) piece first.  She has lots of suggestions in that tutorial for using the Kreg that aren't included in the corner piece tutorial, probably because it would be redundant.  I unfortunately built a corner piece first, so I definitely had a few live and learn moments.  (Which is to say I cursed like a sailor at a pile of wood before my neighbors walked by with their baby.  I blame them for walking a baby at 9:30 at night.) 

So after night one, I cleaned up my mess, (well, sort of), and was left with this:

P.S.- That board hanging off the top of the back rest is not connected and is not supposed to be there.  I just was too lazy to remove it before snapping the picture.  It was after midnight on a work night, give a girl a break. 

Not too bad for one evenings work.  Building the first piece probably took me 2.5 hours all in, mostly because I had to go back a few times and redo my work.  But I was feeling pretty good about it when all was said and done, and ready to take on the rest of it.  Not that evening though, I try to save my crazy for the weekend.  And that my friends, is tomorrow's story.  But until then, what do you think?  Build anything lately?  Anyone else shopped for outdoor furniture lately?  Not only is it really tough to find something clean and modern, but it's so incredibly expensive!

#3- The Rapture Happened and our Stairs are my Eternal Hell

Let me introduce you to the Hubs, my much funnier, albeit much more vulgar, better half.  His humor usually relies on fart jokes and shock value for laughs, so don't take him too seriously.  (Or hold it against me.)  



Guest Post from The Hubs- Jason

My wife has been *reluctantly* begging me to write a guest post on this blog. I say reluctantly because she thinks I have a potty mouth. She also thinks I can be a bit bi-polar when it comes to home improvement projects. She's right. I f'ing can't stand some of the projects we get ourselves into. However, picturing the end result and the smile on my wife's face when we're finished is what keeps me going. That said, I thought a good topic for my first post would be our ungodly, chicken-wire infested stairs. These have been the source of a lot of personal stress and anxiety. Every time I look at them, my eyes water with tears of vomit.

Here's what I'm referring to:

I'm not sure if the previous owners were trying to create a prison for chickens, or if the wire mesh was more of a safety net to prevent one of their 17 cats from plummeting to their death. Sorry PETA, I just giggled when I envisioned the latter.

To rid my home of the negative chi these stairs created, I first had to remove the metal cat cages/wire mesh material. This was relatively easy. Just my drill and some unsafe positioning of my ladder.

After this crap was removed, I cut into the carpet that was wrapped around all the steps leading up to the Loft and up to the Master Bedroom, hoping to find beautiful stairs underneath. Instead, I found wood stairs that had old paint and spackle all over them. There were also no less than 4 million staples holding the carpet to the stairs.

After a few swear words and a solid throwing of my hammer across the room, I was ready to take on this challenge.

I grabbed my utility knife, our Skill power sander and some 50 grit San paper. I cut the remaining carpet from each individual stair and threw it where it belonged - a gigantic dumpster. After removing the carpet from each step, I used my power sander to prep the stairs for their new stain. All the while, my wife had gone to Home Depot (our second home) to buy all the wood risers. She even cut them to size and stained them so they were ready to go right up. Things were going great. The sun was shining, birds were chirping and I swear I heard Mary Poppins singing me a lullaby somewhere in the clouds.

Then the Rapture happened.

My Skill power sander died. The stain we used on the risers didn't match the stairs. The stairs themselves appeared to be different colors, even though I used the same can of stain, which said "golden goddamn oak" on the front of it. Oh, and our little stuntman tried sliding through one of the steps on his belly, until my wife caught him by the wrists and saved his life. This incident brought on a whole new dimension to my stair project; constant "encouragement" from the Wife to get the job finished. I say "encouragement" because it sounds more positive than "nagging," "lecturing" or "threatening to Bobbit my baby maker."

View from where Ry fell through where he might have fallen if the wife had not been there to catch him.  This is when she went from, "How's the step project going Honey?" to "Get it done in 48 hours or I'm moving out."

Every single aspect of this project sucks. Hard. If you've ever wanted to point and laugh as an adult male cries, just stop by anytime I'm working on my steps.

Yep, that's an empty beer bottle in the background.  What you don't see are the 11 others, but they're around, trust me.

Needless to say, I've been in stair remodeling hell ever since the Rapture. However, I'm confident the woodworking gods will forgive me for whatever I did to piss them off, and our steps will turn out the way I intended. Stay tuned for some progress shots and updates on where I'm at with it.